We had a bunch of kids who got in big trouble. NYPD trouble. Having to spend the night in jail kind of trouble. When they came back to school we had to address it because it was related to school, but we also wanted to to be supportive because those kinds of interactions can be traumatic.
So we’re sitting in the room with all the kids, lots of individual meetings with parents have happened, or have been scheduled, but we are still going to meet with the whole group as a whole one last time. The other administrators go in hard with the fact that they need to stay out of trouble and what life is like with an NYPD record, especially one without a high school diploma. Then everyone finished and there was a clear chance for me to jump in. What should I say?
Here’s what I came up with…
“Alright kids, we’ve done a lot of talking to you, but you haven’t said anything, let’s go around and hear from you. Let’s have you say these three things:
- How many credits you need to earn in order to graduate
- What you plan to be doing 5 years from now
- What class gives you the most trouble.
And pay attention to what each other is saying because there will be a quiz. ”
The kids went around, awkwardly at first saying off there things. “12 and a half, I think. I’m supposed to be done in April, that’s all I know. I want to be in College. Math…” Then after that I said…
“So now let’s see if you’re listening, Jonathan, do you remember any of the three things that walter said…” We went around again, less awkwardly giving everyone a chance to say what other people’s big 3 are.
“Ok great, now why am I asking you to do this before you’re allowed to go back and attend your classes?” They started to fidget so I quickly answered my question. “Well you guys are lucky to have found a really good group of friends, so you should use your relationship to support each other. The next time one you starts trying to do something dumb you can jump in and say ‘Walter, you know you have 12 and a half credits left, you’re not going to be in college if you keep cutting math class.'” This was met with some laughter. “For real, if there is any positive thing that came out of your whole situation it’s the fact that you have a good group here. Lots of people walk through halls or through the neighborhoods and don’t have anyone. If you guys can figure out how to help each other look towards the future you can do anything.”
Then I might have gone into something about that book the pact or something. Actually, no I would probably have just cut it there.
Ok actually I didn’t say any of it. When it came for my turn to talk I just sat silently and agreed with what everyone else was saying. I wasn’t really sure that I would have a chance to chime in or when it would be and then the moment was gone. Everything I wrote after “Here’s what I came up with…” was what I came up with at 4:48 in the morning and decided to write up here. On the chance that this group gets in to trouble again, I’ll see if I can use this and I’ll come back here and comment on how it went.